Avoiding the Comparison Trap + Running Across America, Boston Marathon
Emily Holland shares the mindset shift that got her running again, a Cherokee runner in addiction recovery is on a cross-country run, feel-good stories from Boston, and more.
It’s so easy to fall into the comparison trap. Especially when scrolling through our social media feeds and seeing only life’s highlights, we measure our progress against others’ successes.
I experience this almost daily.
One minute, I’m feeling good about the 5-mile run I just finished. The next minute, I’m stretching my tight hamstrings while looking at a runner’s Instagram post about a marathon they just crushed.
But it’s not just running. We are all at risk of falling into the comparison trap in nearly every area of our lives: relationships, parenting, career, wealth, physical looks, etc.
Running Lifestyle is approaching its first birthday, yet I’m constantly comparing my progress to other writers — and TEAMS of writers — who have been building media brands for years. And kids? I don’t have them, and I don’t go a day lately without feeling “less than” compared to women who are mothers.
Comparing our efforts, progress, and achievements to others can make us feel like we’re not good enough. Unsuccessful.
It really is one of the worst things we can do for our self-confidence. Comparison can be a killer of joy, if we let it.
I recently chatted with trail runner Emily Holland about this very topic. She shared that when she moved to Boulder, Colorado, she became extremely aware of how fast other runners were and how slow it made her feel. It took the joy out of running. So, she stopped.
In the Q&A bonus below, Emily shares the mental shift that got her back on the trails and no longer comparing herself to others. The takeaway: Do it for you.
Avoiding comparison is easier said than done. External pressures and perceived expectations are everywhere. And while social media seems like it should be the easiest threat to tune out, it’s often not.
Despite my own challenges with comparison, however, I know this to be true: The less we compare ourselves to others and the more we embrace our own journeys, the more likely we are to find joy.
So, the next time you compare yourself to someone else, I challenge you to identify it and stop. Find the joy in what you have and where you’re at. I’ll join you.
- Kimberly, founder & editor
A Mental Shift to Avoid the Comparison Trap as Runners
Running on the same trails as the professional and elite runners who train in Boulder had a pull on Emily Holland. The trail runner and podcast consultant says she began to feel sad about her running and hid her workouts on Strava. Then, she stopped running altogether and turned her focus to rock climbing. Below, she shares the mindset shift that helped her stop comparing herself to others and find the joy in trail running again.
“I think I just started giving less of a shit. I mean, to be honest, I don’t know that there was a switch, like, ‘Oh, I don’t care anymore.’
I did a lot of work within my rock climbing world — mental work, where I was like, ‘Yes, there’s fear of falling, fear of failure.’ But there’s also a lot of comparison that happens within the rock climbing community.
I did a lot of work with a coach a couple years ago — a couple coaches — and they helped me to really focus on my own path, my own existence within rock climbing, my set of unique skills, and my unique set of challenges.
I think that actually just helped and translated into other aspects of my life. And now I look at running as like, this is the thing that I’m going to do for myself. And yes, if I bring other people into it and they are excited about the process, too, cool.
But what I’m trying to do is literally just be as fit as I can, as healthy as I can — and not fit like skinny. I mean fit like feeling fit, feeling strong when I’m doing my workouts and when I’m doing my long runs, and hopefully when I do my race. I just want to do better on this 50K than I did on my last 50K. That’s really the parameter for me this year.
So, I can’t say it was like a quick switch. It was more over time, I was like, ‘Why am I letting what other people are doing take the joy out of these things that are supposed to be so joyful and also meaningful?’
They are hard, too, and that’s good. I’m really happy that they’re hard. I don’t want them to be easy.” — Emily Holland, trail runner and co-founder of Wild Poppy Creative Consulting
Read Emily’s full Q&A on Running Lifestyle for more on avoiding comparison, plus:
⛰️ Her trail running journey
🧠 Body and mind changes after she stopped drinking alcohol
🎧️ Favorite running podcasts
New on Running Lifestyle
Thinking about getting into trail running? Eight UESCA-certified running coaches shared their advice on the fueling adjustments you’ll need to make, why you should forget about your pace, and more. Read the article here.
Partners & Promotions
Affiliate partner of Running Lifestyle, Skratch Labs is offering 20% off your online order with the discount code: RUNNINGLIFESTYLE20
The Lake Norman Half Marathon Series (in North Carolina, just north of Charlotte) is offering 10% off the registration price for any of its four races. Use coupon code kv through December 31, 2025.
What I’m Listening to, Reading, and Watching
The “Marathon Handbook Podcast” recapped the Boston Marathon’s men’s and women’s professional race, plus co-host Katelyn shared her own race experience.
John Korir, who suffered a fall early in the race, won the Boston Marathon with a time of 2:04:45. He and his brother Wesley, who won the race in 2012, are the first siblings to earn Boston Marathon titles. (Boston.com)
This year’s youngest Boston Marathon runner, Annabel Silbersher, turned 18 the day before the race and raised more than $20,000 for the Christopher & Dana Reeve Foundation. (Boston.com)
Brazilian runner Pedro Arieta stopped near the finish line and sacrificed his 2:40 goal race time to help another runner. (Boston.com)
Can you imagine signing up for a race, then showing up on race morning to “no signs” of an organized event? That’s what happened to 11 runners in Essex, UK. They decided to run the course anyway. (BBC)
According to RunSignup’s data, races are seeing a surge in Gen Z registrations, with runners in the 18-29 age range increasing from 12.8% (2021) to 16.2% (2024). (RCCA)
More than 20 robot runners, developed by teams from universities and companies, joined humans to run a half marathon in China. The winning robot finished in a time of 2:40. (CNN)
Founder of Conscious Gear, Charlotte Young Bowens, shares her inspiration to design hydration vests that fit more body types. (The Guardian)
Over on Instagram…
These runners share their “why” for running Boston:
Cherokee running coach Kallup McCoy II, who’s in addiction recovery, is halfway through his journey of running across America while raising money for his nonprofit RezHOPE:
To bookend the topic of avoiding comparison, a reminder to run for you:
Happy running!